Friday, July 9, 2010

Of Moobs and Wrong Way Out Underwear

The Lesser Gender.

I think today I'd like to put a focus on the male species. On the silly, the dull, the severe and the plain ... .

Specimen #1
Species: Male Human
Location: Backstage
Time: Before A Show

He is changing. I see that his 'Renoma' (the underwear band la~) looks a bit odd. Then, being female, it hit me very quickly that he was wearing his underwear the wrong way out. (Of course, what more can you expect of men anyway, right?) So I tell him.

"Hey, you're wearing your underwear the wrong way."
"Huh? No, it's supposed to be like that."
"No, seriously, you're wearing it the wrong way out."
"Noo.... it's supposed to be like... oh."

***

Specimen #2
Species: Male Human
Location: Carpark outside Rehearsal Studio
Time: After Rehearsal

Him: "Hey! I wanna ride your bike! I wanna try I wanna try!"
Another: "Eh. Don't anyhow la. You got license or not?"
Him: "Yea! Of course! 2B AND 2A!"
Me: "Try lor, here's the key"
Him: "It's auto right?"
Me: "Yea."
Him: "Where's the clutch?"

***

Specimen #3
Species: Male Human
Location: School
Time: Before a Show

He was taking over my role for the next show as I had something else on.

Me: "So, ok? Any questions?"
Him: "Yea, what kind of accent do you want me to do the lines in?"

***

Specimen #4
Species: Male Human
Location: On the Phone

I had just asked for the road name so that I can get there. These are the directions given to me:

"Ok Ok. Where Are You Now? Can You See The Petrol Station? Is It Caltex? Which Caltex Is It? Is It The One Opposite Shell Station Or Is Shell Station On The Other Side Of The Road? Ok Ok. You Don't Know, That's Ok. You Just Listen To Me. I Will Give You The Exact Directions. Do You See The XYZ Building? No? The QRS Building? No? The VIP Building? No? (goes on to name about 6 other buildings in the area)
OK Ok, Never Mind. You See The Tiny Road On The Side Of The Big Road With The Trees Along The Sides?"

Me: "Can you just give me the name of the road, please?"

Him: "Huh? (aside to someone else) Eh! What's the name of this road ah?"

***

Well, that's all for today folks! Smell ya later!

3 comments:

Goldfish Uncle said...

yup yup, you just gotta love em men

Joanne-Marie said...

Wow! Are you THE goldfish uncle?! So exciting! I love your blog sir, you're hilarious!

SilentZephyr said...

Haha! This one made me smile when I was having a reeeaaally bad day.

Thanks Jo.